Did that headline grab you? It’s called click-bait. And while I do have things to share with you about weddings, I don’t want to trick you into reading. Too much of what passes for information is merely a means to make money, one way or another.

But the catchy title does beg the question: what are the important things to know about a wedding? Is it the cost of flowers? Or is it the meaning of a milestone in life? People easily get lost on this path and while planning a fantastic party, don’t lose sight of who you are and where you are going. Try, I know it’s difficult, try not to get pulled into too much on-line craziness.

With a wealth of information at our fingertips how do we discern the good advice from the bad? The useful from the mundane? An overall problem with internet wedding sites is the one-size-fits-all approach. And I have noticed that most of the wedding advice is aimed at women, leaving out half the population!

Some of the worst wedding advice on-line has to do with budgets. Everyone’s budget is different, and you should not expect to spend a certain amount, but rather, determine what you can afford or are willing to spend. Costs also vary in different areas.

So, what the heck, I’m going to weigh in, too, and give you those six things after all. Here it goes!

1. Best Day Ever. It is truly a wonderful day when you marry your best friend. But you’re setting the bar a little high perhaps in calling it the “best day ever.” I understand this is just hyperbole and now a popular phrase … But what if it’s not? Could you deal with a few disappointments? What if something goes wrong? Will you be devastated by that? Just remember to keep some perspective and go with flow. Keep the bar at a reasonable height!

2. The Perfect Look. Many women get extremely caught up in the beauty tips, dieting, hair and make-up, not to mention the dress… this is all fine but don’t forget to look like yourself and be yourself. As I like to say, don’t do the “up-do” if it’s not you!

3. It’s YOUR day. Unless you’re eloping, no, not really. A wedding is an event that brings in the whole family and community. You declare your intention before them (and if you are religious before God). That is kind of the point of having them there. So remember, this is not only about you. Don’t make it into a big egotistical show.

4. Don’t worry about trends. It’s OK to see what’s going on around us, and even fun and inspiring, but don’t feel pressure to follow the latest ideas especially if you prefer something else.

5. Every detail will be perfect. See no. 1 and no. 2 — and to that I will add that DIY doesn’t always save you money, and don’t freak out if it rains.

6. Traditions should be followed. Traditions, customs, rituals and rules can be meaningful, if they work for you. I’ve written about this a million times. Don’t feel bad about not wanting to include something that doesn’t makes sense to you. Remember, traditions evolve, so lean forward!

If you read to the end I guess this click-bait thing isn’t so bad after all!

Lois Heckman is a certified Celebrant officiating in the Poconos and beyond. She writes about creating meaningful weddings, focusing on ceremony, ritual, and diverse traditions. Find her on Instagram, Facebook and website: www.LoisHeckman.com

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